For the first time in my life, I felt too busy to do anything. I couldn't keep up with my personal to-do list for even the simplest tasks like mailing a birthday card or getting a car wash. The longer I put something off, the bigger it seemed, making me more overwhelmed, and more defeated when it didn't get done.
I realize now, it wasn’t that I was 'too busy'.
Instead, I had allowed myself to become over-consumed and overwhelmed with my new career. I was working 10-12 hours a day for 11 months straight. I couldn’t find a balance. I kept telling myself that it would get better with a promotion and a raise – I just had to ‘get through this tough period’ to ultimately get where I wanted to be.
So I overlooked the fact I was neglecting the other important facets of my life. Working long days, working weekends, and studying for my real estate license left me physically and emotionally spent. I was no longer able to do the things that filled my soul. No time for nature, friends, working out, tennis, or traveling. I owe some of you friends an apology.
If I left you on ‘read’ (literally or figuratively)... I’m so sorry. Every ounce of energy and every second of my time was consumed with work.
But quarantining in Mexico for 3.5 months forced me to stop everything and take a breath. I looked inward and looked outward. I had an existential crisis and then–an epiphany.
I had been telling myself a lie.
I was living a narrative that I can only blame myself for: ‘I must get a corporate job so that I can hopefully become a CMO and make a lot of money one day.’ But I don’t want to be a CMO at that company, in the corporate world, if it means the next 10 years will be anything like the past 11 months. There’s a million people who have a wonderful experience in the corporate world, but for me,
my spirit doesn’t soar chained to a desk... my creativity doesn’t flourish in a cubicle... my light doesn't shine under the fluorescents.
I decided it was time to make a change and live my life on my terms. And what better
way than to do it with your life partner? It perfect time as any to take a leap and become business partners with John in Johnny Vacay. We had always dreamt of this but for some reason it always seemed so far in the future and out of reach. The biggest risk a person can take is to do nothing at all. So why not NOW?
Cheers to the next chapter!